sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
bring money and cleavage
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
