he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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