Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
