he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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