sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize