I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize