problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
