everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Be still, my beating vagina.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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