It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
