Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
