Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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