He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
