well you can't waste a boner
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
