You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize