I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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