Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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