I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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