I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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