They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
