apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
