any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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