You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
