Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
