So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
