We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i came on her dog
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Randomize
