WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
