You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
