I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
