I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize