I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
