Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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