yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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