My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
