and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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