saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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