Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize