Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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