if you like me you must not know who I am
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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