Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I would ride that face into the sunset
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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