Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
