i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Randomize
