I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
