I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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