So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize