she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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