Pants 0. Shit 1.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
