The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
