The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
