what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
two words...techno handjob
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
