im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He better not be in your backpack
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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